Dream or Nightmare?

Often dreams are good, they paint our canvas with colors are spread in our heart or soul but somehow don’t see the daylight. Dreams narrate our stories and might bring smile on the face, even in tight sleep. They give us the world where everything is possible.
That does not happen always, as every coin has two sides.
I am narrating the dream that sends shivers to my spine, this is the only dream that wakes me in the middle of the night, this is the dream that scares me to go back to sleep again…this is the only “Nightmare” I am yet to overcome…
It is a dream that begins like any other dream would; it remains comforting till I am in never-land which is deep within into the fairyland.
Here it how it goes, I am wondering in the wild, enjoying the scenic view, registering the mesmerizing yet untouched beauty, which has so much to offer yet so less to take. Suddenly I sight a cave that calls me to wonder inside and feel the ravishing beauty preserved under the cover. Without any hesitation, I enter to explore.
Around the doors it looks like the cave has been traveled, yet looks so tempting to explore. After coring the doors I am amidst massive space that offers the echo to my voice, which gives an comforting feeling to my ears. At a few pace there is a small pond which holds the water silent. It gives the reflection of the gigantic space around it. I feel so enticed that it feels like cloud nine.
The call does not stop yet, to be precise the voyage did not begin yet.
I am thrilled to explore the cave more so I wonder to the place that seemed unraveled and gave a spooky look, I step up to be the first one to have conquered the darkness, thought I do not see where this path was leading to yet I continue my voyage. I walk fearless of what was yet to come, I did not look back for a long time, well even if I looked, it was not going to help as I could not see anything in the dark…
Suddenly I feel hard to inhale, may be it’s the nitrogen, as this path is never been walked on. But some how a sense of walls closing in was growing, may be it is humane, or the darkness is giving this kind of nausea. I heard foot step ever since I walked. May be it is the echo I met at the door steps crawls here too? Then I have nothing to fear, if there is echo I this means the walls are not closing in…there is space.
I am having a smile in my sleep now, as I have the feeling of been praised after everyone knew I have conquered the forgotten part of this cave. It felt like discovering the timeless ruins from a place visited by all, but the special one, that is me, had the vision to bring what was kept hidden.
Suddenly, I am sweating, the smile turns to a bit of uncomfortable roll.
The walls were really closing, I have my hands spread but they are not wide spread as I have to walk this tight place. It does bother me, yet it looks worth taking this uncomfortable walk. Soon this walk is no more normal, I am forced to crawl, and I feel suffocated.
I have to get out! I cannot do it…. The wall they are rushing towards me!
I try to turn back, “Go on, I am behind you.” I am zapped to find someone behind me. I cannot see him, the voice is masculine, “I have been following you, you cannot give up now, besides, I see the small hole, there is this ray of light, we have an exit, go on.”
The voice felt encouraging, with mixed emotions, I carry on, but this suffocation!
I begin to crawl faster. I lose more energy and get less air, and now I feel the space behind me race towards me, it’s a trap, there no way out, I could yell and tell the voice to push back, but I feel helpless. My conscious tells me that the voice following me is smiling and it an evil laugh…
I could not concentrate on this I need to get out, walls around me are crushing me from everywhere, left, right, top, bottom, Oh God! What to do?
I lay still for a second and when I raise my head I see an opening, there is my escape, there is my way out, I have to make it, I have to out run this suffocation. I am going to do it. I began to move like a torpedo. Still the space did not allow me to crawl my way out. This exit is so close, I can reach it, I being to fade, the evil laugh haunts me, my lungs are giving away, the hole is not an exit, it is just a small opening, I see the world from this peak, I can cry out loud, yet somehow I have no strength left to speak, I stretch my hand towards the hole, I see someone, “please help me!”, I say these words within my soul, for I know there is no one to hear it. I lay still, no tears, no grudge, no sense, no air, just a fading sensation.
I speak, “you yet have chance friend, go back, find your way, you can still survive.” The voice dies out, the laugh disappears, I am fooling myself, there was no one, even if there was, and he left way back. He must have asked me to retrieve, but I carried on…what a fool!
I look helplessly at the hole, no expectation, just waiting for something, I cannot describe what, I have no words, guess this is what they call being brain dead.
Suddenly, a gush of wind, I see a leaf fly, felt like hope, but wait…
Noooo! The leaf, fell right on top of the hole, there is darkness again, sweat, suffocation, silence…
Just silence!

With a sudden jolt I wake up, gasping for air, sweating, yet see the darkness, its night, I need air, I breathe like this air is not going to last, where was I? Where am I? What happened? I am horrified! I stare in the dark, afraid to move a muscle, no sound but of my own diaphragm, expanding and contracting…
I sit tight with my legs wrapped in my arms! God I am sweating now…this has given me shivers in day light too.

Is the nightmare over? I have no answer! But I cannot go back to sleep now, I am too scared to fall, may be the fear of death, I cannot define anything.
It’s an open question for me till date.

For learned few, this can be the self created fear in my life, or may be some unfinished business, or even the vicious circle that ignores me and cocoons me in my world for better.. Or maybe something else. Whatever the interpretation this dream might mean, it still remains a nightmare to me, I leave it open for you to decide, is it really a dream or my worst nightmare…